At first, Autumn’s behavior made her position obvious. Months before the results were even announced, she had already reblogged multiple zine countdown and recruitment posts, showing that she was actively following the project. When she later received the contributor invitation, her own words — “I filled it and joined… I hope I can write despite being busy” — confirmed her excitement and willingness to participate.
Yet when the harassment campaign escalated, her tone changed. On a smaller, alternate account, she told me: “I didn’t really want to join the zine anyway.”
This is not a neutral clarification — it is a strategic withdrawal. By claiming she “never wanted to join,” she tried to avoid offending anyone inside the fandom, while at the same time refusing to acknowledge that my actions to defend her (and myself) were legitimate.
The essence of this claim is not honesty but self-preservation:
- To the fandom at large, she wanted to appear untouched and uninvolved.
- To me, she wanted to distance herself, implying the zine’s decision was irrelevant.
- In practice, she abandoned me to carry the label of “troublemaker,” while erasing her own prior enthusiasm and complicity.
What looks like neutrality is in fact avoidance. By rewriting her stance, she sought to escape consequences — yet left me to handle the full weight of the accusations.